child of God, wife, mother, recovering anorexic who longs to see the beauty in herself that she sees in the world around her
Showing posts with label blessed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label blessed. Show all posts

Monday, November 26, 2012

God in the ordinary

Yesterday at church, Pastor passed the microphone around for anyone to say what they are thankful for.  Person after person stood up and told tales of how God had moved mightily.  I never talk when they pass the microphone, but yesterday the tug at my soul was far too great.  I still wasn't going to speak but the microphone got handed right next to my head and I suddenly was reaching for it.

"I have nothing profound to say." I heard the strange echo of my own voice being broadcast to each person in the sanctuary.  "I am just thankful that I am at church with my whole family.  We've been battling the crud and missed the last five weeks of church while we each passed sickness to the next. I'm thankful today that my family is healthy enough, finally, that we could come to church today!"

I sat with the sick feeling in my stomach that comes when I talk in front of large groups.  But I didn't regret standing.  On the way home, I told Hubby I don't usually talk when they give the opportunity.  He said he was glad that I did this time.  And as I talked to him I knew exactly why I felt so drawn to share.

I was thankful for something small.  I was thankful for the fact that God showed up in an ordinary way in my life.  In comparison to the stories of miracles upon miracles, it was not worth celebrating.  But see that is the reason that I needed to celebrate.  Is it possible that we often miss God because we are looking for the wonderous not the ordinary?  Do we too often look over the ways that God says "I love you, Child" because we haven't seen glory surrounding it? 

I'm thankful for stories of brain surgeries that were successful against the odds.  I'm thankful for stories of job transfers that brought the person to a place where the owner had been praying for a godly man to fill the position and God directed both parties to each other.  I'm thankful for the prodigals who renewed relationships with their families and for the family finally able to adopt their special needs child after a long and hard road.  Those are amazing stories and well worth celebrating. 

But so are the little stories.  The stories that say my family is finally over thier colds, that someone who feels overwhelmed was able to wake up with a smile for the first time in weeks, that the rolls you made on Thanksgiving turned out well, that your favorite song came on the radio.  You get it.  There are a million ways God says He loves us and if we only wait to hear the big ones, we will miss out on so much of God.

Oddly enough, I was just sitting at my desk reading a book my dear friend gave me.  And I read these words,
"Isn't it here? The wonder?  Why do I spend so much of my living hours struggling to see it?  Do we truly stumble so blind that we must be afronted with blinding magnificence for our blurry soul-sight to recognize grandeur?  The very same surging magificence that cascades over our every day here.  Who has time or eyes to notice?"
 
That paragraph came from One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  If you haven't read it, you should.  It is a beautiful book.  I just loved that the day after I told Hubby that we miss God in the day to day because we look for Him only in the extrodinary would be the day that I read in such poetic form the exact sentiment.
 
What are you thankful for today?  In the midst of pain there is still something beautiful.  In the midst of suffering God still says I love you.  How will you hear it today?  A song that soothes the soul, an email from an old friend, the falling of snowflakes on a quiet day, a cup of coffee in a favorite mug or shared with a friend.  Whatever it is, know that God is saying He loves us today, and we need only to hear it in our own languages. 

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

body appreciation day 1 - my hands

I'm specifically looking for things my body does well.  I choose to dishonor my body in so many ways, punishing it for not being a certain way, for not responding a certain way or for responding in any way against what my mind desires.  But in the spirit of the new year and having a desire to get past this once and for all, I want to honor my body.  I'm not sure what that looks like for future posts but for today, it looks like this.....

I am so grateful that I have two functional thumbs!  You don't know how much you use your thumbs until you cannot use one of them for two weeks.  For the first of those weeks, I couldn't even use my right hand at all.  So today, what I appreciate about this temple that God gave me is my thumbs.  The right one is still tingling when touched on one side and doesn't have full strength back yet, but still, I can use my hands. 

My hands have held my husband.  My hands have comforted my children.  My hands have wiped away tears.  My hands have cradled my newborn children.  My hands have helped to teach my children to write.  My hands let me express my feelings on paper or on the computer.  Today my hands will shovel my in-laws sidewalk to keep them from having to go outside in the cold.  My hands have offered kindness to many.

Thursday, December 22, 2011

just count your blessings instead of.....

My all time favorite Christmas movie is White Christmas.  Yesterday I was tired and grumpy and I decided I was going to sit down and watch White Christmas.  I love the scene when Rosemary Clooney and Bing Crosby sing

When you're worried 
and you can't sleep,
just count your blessings
instead of sheep
and you'll fall asleep
counting your blessings 

I may have revised the song a little in my head last night.  

When you're worried
and you can't eat
just count your blessings
instead of bites
 and you'll eat your meal
counting your blessings

This mornings breakfast was brought to you by counting my blessings instead of bites.  I know I don't always remember how blessed I am.  In the midst of restricting, in the midst of punishing myself, in the midst of hurting, in the midst of hiding my lies, I am still blessed.  Breakfast this morning was brought to you by the following blessings:
  • the dear friend who months ago told me to count my blessings instead of bites
  • the baby she is carrying
  • snow on the ground that makes me feel slightly more in the Christmas mood
  • the kids being on Christmas break so I don't have to drive in said snow
  • my Hubby who is worried about me and trying to take care of me
  • hot water for my shower this morning
  • the beautiful faces of 3 little boys who call me mamma (even the oldest still calls me mamma, melts my heart!)
I'm not doing great but I did manage breakfast with my family this morning.  That is a start.