child of God, wife, mother, recovering anorexic who longs to see the beauty in herself that she sees in the world around her

Tuesday, July 10, 2012


I didn't finish the blog challenge in June.  Part of that was every time I thought about mystery I could hear Madonna's voice in my head singing

Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone
I hear you call my name
And it feels like home

Not the entire song, just those first few lines.  And then I would giggle because I'm pretty sure that singing Like a Prayer isn't what blogging about mystery meant.  :)

So now that I've had a chance to think beyond Madonna, I realize why mystery gave me writer's block.  Mystery both terrifies me and motivates me.  The thought that today could be completely different from yesterday scares me.  Knowing that I don't know what today holds, good or bad, is frightening.  I so want to be in control.  I so want to emotionally climate control my life.  And I can't.

By the same token, mystery is appealing.  Thinking that today could be completely different from yesterday also brings a big sigh of relief.  Come to think of it, yesterday was kinda draining.  I'm glad that today has the potential to be different and really it will be different because even if I have a day similar, today will bring different people into my life even if they need a similar solution as those yesterday.

My desire to always be in control makes mystery an enemy but desiring to experience my life rather than endure it makes mystery a beautiful and alluring friend.  How I choose to view it may be different from day to day but in the grand scheme of things, I think that mystery has gotten a seriously bad rap.

1 comment:

  1. you describe this so perfectly! it's so true that mystery can be scary but it can also be exciting... weird how it brings both emotions. but don't let the fear stop you from experiencing the excitement that mystery can bring.

    ps- i love old school madonna!! ;)