Overall, I am in a fairly good place right now. Come on, today I bought new shirts AND I had a piece of cheesecake tonight with hubby. To shop and eat in the same day is a good place :) And somewhere in the back of my mind the orange voice talks again. Getting healthy me is enjoying that I can enjoy life again. Sure there are rough times but I can feel again, I can talk to my hubby again, I can play with my kids again, I can concentrate and read again.
And yet I hear that nagging little voice in the back of my head wondering how much weight I can lose before my physical next month. Orange (aka anorexia) is telling me that she misses me. Orange is wondering why I've not joined her for our summer rendezvous. Orange thoughts are torturing my trying to be healthy brain. Orange is trying to promise that it could be different. Orange wants me to not have hips. Orange despises that I have the pooch that all women have where our reproductive organs are. Orange is fighting hard to be heard.
I guess that means that I have to fight harder to not listen.